Barbara Murphy, a long-standing member of the ATD community, passed away on 2 October 2024, after a very courageous battle with long term illness. Barbara was mother to daughters Anne Marie, Helen, Siobhan and Gemma, and son Clive. She was grandmother to 18 grand-children and a great-grandmother to 4 great-grand-children. Clive accompanied her during these past years of ill health, and was living with her in Thatcham and more recently in Newbury.

Her children were her whole world.  In her early years as a young mother she was faced with significant challenges. Her great determination and strength as a parent, often on her own, was able to meet the enormous struggles to keep her children all together with her as a family, to her pride—and a credit to her!

Barbara first came to know ATD through Frimhurst Family House in Surrey in the early 1980’s when she came for a six-month residential stay with husband Tony, and her first children Anne-Marie and Clive, then two years old. Helen was born while the family was in Frimhurst. There Barbara discovered how to stand her ground and she found her voice.

Togetherness and creative cookery

In time, each of her children came to know Frimhurst as Barbara regularly brought her growing family there for short well-being stays and the monthly and annual events that brought many other parents and their children together to enjoy a time of friendship, fun, discussion opportunities, to learn a skill in the workshop or in the kitchen, and to build friendships. There was a strong sense of togetherness at these times that she liked and needed as she battled against the odds.

Barbara enjoyed being involved in children’s activities, especially creative cookery sessions with them making cakes and tarts. In Frimhurst’s kitchen, Ruby Wilcher and Hilda Gadd were the inspiration to mothers like Barbara for their creative cookery recipes when on a small budget with the children.

Barbara’s kind approach is remembered today by one  child who added that she helped each of them equally; but kept a firm approach with the children to always speak respectfully about others who they knew and especially when with her. She was also known for her sense of fun and enjoying having many laughs with others.

With her serious side Barbara was also ready to take time with another parent and consistently sought to understand when others needed someone to confide in. She was known for her straight- forward talking when in discussion groups, attending the monthly Fourth World University meetings during the 1980’s held in Addington Square in London.

Speaking up and engaging others

She wanted to explore and question how she and other parents participating could develop new ways to demand improvements in housing and work opportunities that would really improve the chances for a better family life.  She expressed that this would provide a better future for her children and a better life than she had experienced herself.  She was keen to speak up for herself and her children and on behalf of other families.

Barbara came regularly to the ATD events over the past decades when her health allowed. She even took part in an international event in 1989 that took her to France to the ATD Fourth World international Centre and to Rome as part of a 50-strong multi-faith world delegation to visit the Pope.

She would readily engage with others she met to explain to them the history of the Fourth World Movement and would also speak of her personal journey and involvement, especially if she knew it could help someone else.

Deeply missed

One of the last events she came to with several members of her family was in July 2017, an important anniversary of Frimhurst.

Barbara was born into a large family and had enjoyed discovering in more recent times, about the many members of her wider family network in Ireland and the UK, and her family history.

Barbara remained very courageous facing the challenges of her illness, keeping her spirit up, and her sense of fun. She always had the very reassuring and constant close presence of her children around her till the very end. She gave it all to her family and until her last moment she found strength in having them around her. She will be deeply missed by her family and by many of us who will remember her with much affection.